Adoption: part one

I know this post would not go over well in some religious circles. It really doesn't matter does it? We should always tell the truth as God gives it to us. I'm definitely not a biblical scholar, I lay no claim to anything except a relationship with my heavenly Father. This is not a disclaimer, just fact. Some may think that I'm insane or unstable, I'm not! What I'm about to expose on theses pages is true. I have changed the names of the children to protect them. I may not be as nice to the witches-oh well. You know who you are and so do I. You will find out why. The bible says to have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove(expose, rebuke) them. I have enclosed prayer in this post.

Father, I asked you to bless those that read and believe. I bind all demonic and second heaven activities, and  every spirit assigned against my assignment. Holy Spirit have your way. I bind all mind binding, and blinding spirits  that would try to come against anyone reading these pages . I pray that you exposed the enemy and bring him to an open shame. I decree and declare that the people of God will exercise discernment between what is light and what is darkness. I ask that the eyes of our understanding be open to your Divine truth. I declare that the people of God will not be ignorant of the devices of the enemy. That they will sharply detect the wiles of the devil. I come up against witchcraft in all it's forms in the name of Jesus. I break in pieces every spiritual cauldrons, and stirring pots, I break the power of all  incantation, proliferation, chains, fetters, snares,and all witchcraft spell, voodoo spell, satanic spell,  hexes, vexes, and curses, Father I ask that you destroy the power of all witchcraft prayer, psychic prayers, and every idle word spoken against your original plan in Jesus name. I decree and declare they will not stand; they shall not come to pass; they shall not take root and all their violent verbal dealing are returned to the sender double-fold in the name of Jesus. No weapon formed against the people of God shall prosper, and every evil trap lain in the spirit is set off  before we get to it.. In Jesus name!

It started one day about two years ago. I was working at a dermatological surgery center. I was overworked and wore many hats in the office. I was the mother hen so to speak. All staff, doctor, accounts payable and receivable, pay check , billing issues and some patient care hung on my shoulder. It wore me down. I had a constant headache and had started experiencing heart palpitations. In order to get through the day, I would go to work a hour early, so that I could pray for that day. I would sit outside in front of the building and cry out to God in distress. The office building next door to the office had been empty for the four years that I had worked for the company. The building had recently opened, I was curious to what company had required the office space. I found out it was a school for high school children that had emotional and behavior problems in the public school system. Now every morning during my quiet prayer time, I would hear the robustious ranting of teenagers going down the wrong path.

During this time my prayers started to change. I had asked the Lord to teach me to pray. He told me don't be afraid to pray the Psalms and he started teaching me what some biblical words meant, like Belial-worthless, evil and wicked, he would say stuff like I hate that spirit Jezebel, it kills my prophets.  He taught me to pray spiritual warfare prayers. For years I had gotten the prophecy that I would cast out demons. Even though that's what Jesus and the apostles did, I wanted no parts of it. God would not let me get away from it. I ran like Jonah ran from Nineveh. God pursued me and put me in situations that had me so scared; I would make a mistake, and allow his spirit out, the demons had no choice but to flee.

Four years earlier: While attending a different church, in a different state strange things started happening in church. I find out that people in the church were using witchcraft, one lady went to a voodoo priest to get something to get rid of me, permanently. A couple of month before that incident the Lord spoke to me and said, "they're going to want you dead, but nothing by any means will harm you". I had no idea what he was talking about. I didn't think I posed a threat to anyone and I definitely didn't feel as if I had any enemies. My ministry had just started and to be honest I didn't have a clue as to what I was doing. I didn't want to be the target of death threats, so I told the Lord, "No thank you, I'm not signing up for that one." In the army of the Lord some people can enlist and some are just drafted. I was drafted, he didn't care that I was a flatfooted, lilylivered coward. He told me I had courage because he put it in me. That's when he gave me the name Fearless.

The day the hex was to be put on me I prayed the 91st Psalms before service. I found out later that- Two women in the church came up with a foggy wet substance from some voodoo priest. One women thought her husband was attracted to me and the other felt I was favored, because I had been given the Wednesday night slot for ministry, and I had to speak on some given Sunday's. As scared and unsure of myself as I was I would have gladly given her have the floor. I had no desire for the others one's short fat balding potbellied husband, in my opinion both of them were being ridiculous. Ridiculous or not, they devised a scheme for my demise. They were bigger than me, scary and refused to hug me before church started this particular Sunday. One even walked up to me and put her hand out to me as if we were about to become opponents in a match that she was sure to win. I reluctantly shook it, mostly because the church was filling up and I didn't want to appear rude. The two of them walked to the back of the church, leaving me trembling in fear of getting beat-up. I got up and started silently quoting Psalms 27. When they came back to were I was standing one was coming up to me as if to hug or pray for me. I could see the foggy substance in a small oil bottle. As she got to me and hugged me, I whispered in her ear, Shirley I love you , but I'm standing on the truth. Then I hear a loud growl come out her mouth and suddenly without warning, I hear and feel something really loud and powerful come from me. It reminded me of a train. It had totally taken over my body. Shirley's body was twisting and distorting as this power came forth. What was in me was clearly the aggressor and seemed to back Shirley up into a corner. I could not hear what was coming out of my mouth, I could only feel it. From my peripheral vision, I see the other woman (the one who shook my hand) grab her bible and run out of the church. Finally Shirley lay in a heap and I hear myself saying in a loud voice, "LOOSE HER". I looked up and everyone in the church is staring at me with their mouths hanging open. I put my head down and sit down in embarrassment. In my head I reprimanded Jesus. "I wish you would have let me know you were going to do that, now they're going to hate me for real." No one said anything to me the rest of the service or afterward. I wanted to defend myself and explain that that wasn't me, but no one gave me a chance.

 I thought I gotten my chance when at 6:00am the following morning the pastor called me, but before I could make it known, he attacked me and asked me "Who gave you the authority to cast out demons in my church." If he would have worded it any other way, I may have tried to explain myself and Jesus. With God things has a way of going his way. My reply was not the self-defense one I had rehearsed for the past several hours. I said , "You know who, if you have a problem with it, I suggest you take it up with Jesus," in a snarky voice, before  hanging up the phone on him. I never went back to that congregation, although several members called me and told me what had really happened that day. The one who ran out the church confessed the plot, swearing she was an innocent player. A few weeks later God told me to move to Florida. I was there within a week. I started attending a nice Messianic Jewish congregation. God told me he was giving me pastors after his own heart, because I needed to heal. He also told me my biggest problem is that, I don't know who I am, and that he didn't want me in ministry now, he wanted me to learn to "rest," in him. It seemed like a good plan to me, one of the best God had come up with, so far as I was concerned.

I love my new pastors Alyosha and Jody and they love me. They called themselves my spiritual abba and emma. Hebrew for mother and father. Jody always calls me her, "Beautiful One," and I loved my new moniker. In their congregation I found true acceptance, and healing of all the wounds that life and the church had afflicted on me. I was loved as I rested in my heavenly Abba. Like all good things, after awhile it came to an end. Four years after meeting them, God moved them to Israel to ministry to his beloved Israelis. The day they made aliyah(legal immigration to Israel) I was livid.

 Before they left, they were instructed by God to have a service to bless me to go forth into ministry. My time of healing and waiting was over. I didn't want to feel grown-up and responsible again. The day of my service, Alyosha who also happens to be a Psalmist played a beautiful heavenly melody that Abba gave him just for me. To this day I can not hear it without crying in thanksgiving and gratitude. Alyosha also told me what my name means in Hebrew, it's Abira and it means strong and High Father and Father sees. When Alyosha told me that it meant strong, I frowned because all the other women in the congregation, who got the meaning of their names, were named after flowers. You would have thought he said, my name is Samson, but all of a sudden things became clear to me. God told me I'm a blood washed daughter of the Most "High," God. My Father is HIGH and I'm strong and I have always been strong. No matter what oppositions I had faced in life I overcame them because, my name meant strong. All through the bible names have meaning and the character of that person fit. Sometimes he changed their names and their character; like Saul to Paul, he let Peter know he was a "rock.' Each time he spoke their names to them they were transformed. My identity had been spoken into me. God let me know who I am.  And I remembered him telling me that my biggest problem was, " You don't know who you are.".... That's when I met the children.

At this time, as I'm sitting in front of my place of employment praying for some release from the stress of that job. I get bombarded with these juvenile delinquents. They're loud, obnoxious and disrespectful. I started watching them and praying for them. My prayers changed from those beggy, desperate prayer to prayers of deliverance and healing for these children. I asked the Lord to send someone to help them. Unbeknownst to me that someone, is going to be me. The first child that spoke to me is a boy of sixteen or seventeen, we will call him James. He's tall and handsome, but very hyper. He moves the entire time we're talking and his eyes are moving fast and unfocused. His starts the conversation by asking me my name. I tell him my name, then he says in a matter of fact tone, "I got raped."